homecoming lesson: Don’t plan for perfect!

so I’m guessing all of my faithful reading are wanting to know about the events of homecoming day. You got it! (sorry it’s taken me so long, but I have to admit it’s been great detaching from the computer and phone this past week)

So, a week ago today my husband came home after 239 days of deployment with the 15th MEU. In the early, before sunrise, hours of the morning the three ships of the MEU started unloading Marines and gear around the beaches of Camp Pendleton. My husband would be taking his final steps off of the USS Rushmore around 0830, onto an LCU, which would bring him to the Del Mar beach, and back to his battalion.

While all of this is going on, I’m at home rushing around getting myself and my son ready. Me; hair, makeup, outfit. My son; the usual morning of getting breakfast, dressed, and ready for school. Yes, DevilPup went to school that morning. You see, our homecoming isn’t like all the glorious ones you see on the news/tv where the Marines (or servicemen of respective branch) get off the bus, have that MAGIC MOMENT where wife wraps here arms around her Marine’s neck, they have that oh-my-goodness-your-finally-home-and-the-stress-and-anxiety-is-finally-melting-out-of-my-body-and-i’m-so-incredibly-happy-to-see-you kiss, he bends down and scoops up all of his children in his eager and longing arms, and they all walk off into the sunset together as one big happy, and finally whole again, family.

ummmmm, yeah. Not so much.

My husband was getting off the bus, and then heading back to work. There’s a lot of boring details about the ‘why’, but I’ll spare you. It’s just the reality of life in the military. TV is just blowing smoke up your ass.

So I knew better than to take all of the kids with me for the big homecoming moment of finally having their daddy back, just to have to go home without him so he could get what work that needed to be done, wrapped up. So I decided I’d take my son to school, get a sitter to stay with the girls, and go alone to greet my love off the bus. I’ll admit when I first found out that this was how the day was unfolding, I was pretty pissed off. I wanted to take him home! I wanted the perfect homecoming!! I deserved the perfect homecoming!! But, as the day approached I found that this might actually be kind of perfect after all. I’d go to see my husband off the bus, and get my missed-you-so-much kiss, get some great pictures of my Marine and I, and not have to worry about keeping the kiddos entertained in the moments before my husband arrived. Then, after my son got out of school we’d go back over to the BN, and I’d be able to take great pictures of my kids having that same missed-you-so-much wrapped up in daddy’s arms moment. Perfect.

HA!! again…. not so much.

So, my early-riser son gets me up at the usual 0515. I sip coffee, he eats breakfast, and we start getting ready for our day. He’s dressed for school, and I’m doing my thing with the hair and makeup. Great. I take him to school, give him a huge kiss and hug, and tell him to, like in sent through the Semper Fi Fairy Door, try to concentrate today and I’ll see him soon and we’ll all go get daddy together.
I get home, finish up getting ready, let the sitter in, and when my girlfriend comes we head out towards my husbands warehouse to wait….

She and I are sitting there chatting together. It’s the usual scene around us. The MCCSCP rented tents are up. There’s breakfast foods laid out. Waiting family and friends are sitting around chit chatting, trying not to melt in the already sticky heat. We’re catching up on kids, work, and life in general. Then, in a moment of curiosity, I turn and look over my left shoulder. There’s two white buses parked. Empty. No Marines on it.
WHEN DID THEY GET THERE?? Seriously!! My gf and I both looked at each other dumbfounded. Neither of us heard the buses pull up. No one announced the Marines approaching. No one around us rushed off to greet the incoming buses. They were just….. there. So did I miss him? Did I miss my magic moment? What the hell is going on right now?

I text him: where r u
He texts back: sitting in office didn’t see you

HOLY SHIT YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW!!! The mixture of emotion in this moment is unreal. UNFUCKINGREAL. At this point nothing, NOTHING, is working out at all how I had hoped. No family walking off into the sunset. No glory moment melting kiss when he steps off the bus. And? Because it’s so damn hot way too fucking early in the damn morning I’m already starting to sweat my freaking makeup off.
I want to scream, but really I just want to find him. See him. Touch him. Hold him. Smell him. Kiss him. I just want him.

So my friend and I take off for his office. I’m zigzagging through Marines. Clearly on a mission to find my man, they kindly step out of my way with grins on their faces. Get to his office. Find…. nothing. It’s empty. (the holyshit factor is starting to creep in again) One of his Marines tells me that he’s just stepped outside. I can only presume it’s to find me. And as I just came in from outside and didn’t see him on my way, there’s no sense in turning around and backtracking. So I headed towards the warehouse bay area. Sure enough, there he was standing in the opening, looking outside, phone in hand and to his ear, mine buzzing in my pocket let me know he was calling me, trying to see where I was. My pace quickened. The warehouse was noisy, but as soon as I got in earshot of him I yelled out, and he quickly snapped around.

….and I had my perfect moment. In seconds I ran to him, closing the gap of the last few moments of our 239 days of being apart from each other. My arms flung around his neck, lips locked, and then eyes met followed by ‘I love you’, and ‘I missed you’, and ‘welcome home’.

Come to find out, trying to plan for perfect was pretty unnecessary. I mean, really it’s the military. Do we ever get perfect? Not usually. At least, not how we think perfect ought to be in the moments trying to seek it. But my perfect came all on it’s own. All I needed was to see his face again. To touch and hold him again. To hear his voice. My love is home. My family is whole again. Everything is perfect.